DERYA DENİZ

Shengal - Every nation, society, soul, body, and every woman cannot forget the genocide carried out against them. The griefs experienced on these lands extend from the peaks of the mountains to the valleys to the plains, deserts, and abandoned places. A community has faced genocide first by Ottoman Empire, then Saddam, and now Barzani for their religion and culture.

Their stories have turned into tragic stories in these lands. The answer to what is the most available thing in Shengal is “the stories of people”. Wherever I go, I hear a story.

Loving everything’s original form…

We met a woman in Serdesh located on the mountainside of Shengal. Her name is Nehla, meaning to love everything’s original form in Arabic. She is a young and beautiful woman. Her story looks so heavy for her eyes, they are lost in thought. She watched us with her shy and furtive glances. She called her son Zerdeşt whenever she felt shy. She took courage from her son. As she was playing with Zerdeşt, we began to talk to her.

We talked about the suicides in women living in the refugee camps located in the region controlled by Barzani. The suicide cases have been on the agenda of the people of Shengal for a while. What is happening in these camps? Why do young women commit suicide? We asked questions to each other and tried to answer them. Just then, Nehla told us, “I came from one of these camps two months ago. I can tell you what is happening there and my story.”

Nehla tells her story…

Nehla invited us to her tent in Serdesh. The next day, we took our cameras to learn more about her story. Nehla met us with her son Zerdeşt. She made tea for us. Her tent is a modest tent, actually, all tents are modest. We began to talk while drinking tea. In a short time, we become friends. She told her story and we listened to her; she listened to us when we talked. And Nehla began to tell her story.

“I am Nehla, from Xanesor, the old Xanesor. Whenever I think of my childhood, I feel different and happy. I went to the school when I was six years old. My father took me to school. I was scared on the first day. Everything was unfamiliar to me and that scared me. In time, I got used to school life and I liked it. I went to the school for a year in Xanesor. I wasn’t in Shengal when the decree against us started. I was helping my uncle, who worked as a seasonal farmworker. Then, we heard they (Daesh) attacked Shengal. We were far away and couldn’t do anything. We didn’t know anything about what was happening in Shengal. People talked about how many people were killed, wounded, and abducted. I felt everything like I was in Shengal. I asked questions to those who fled from there and I was terrified when I heard what was happing there. It was very difficult to accept what happened in Shengal. My family took refuge in the mountains. After the decree took place in Shengal, I stayed with my uncle for a year. Then, my family settled in Bacıde Camp located in Bashur Kurdistan’s Zaxo region. I went to the camp to live with my family.”

“It was like we were in a prison”

When Nehla talked about her life in the camp, she felt bad. She hardly found words to explain what they had faced in the camp. She insisted on telling her story;

“Everyone took care of each other at the beginning, we held on to each other. Everyone kept living with the support we gave each other. In the beginning, there was no school in the camp. Then, the school was opened in the camp and I went to the school for three years. The school wasn’t active so I went to the school only for two months in three years. There were also English courses and therapy places in the camp. We got therapy due to the increasing suicide cases in the camp. I went to therapy places after school every day. Our only living space in the camps was the area surrounded by fences. I walked all places surrounded by fences with my friends. It was like we were in a prison.

"What I faced brought me to the brink of suicide”

Nehla never forgets what happened to her people and the life in the camp. “What I faced brought me to the brink of suicide. I lost the meaning of my life. I couldn’t bear to live in the camp. I cannot forget what happened. I received psychological treatment and felt a little better. Then, I realized that suicide is not the solution. I would live and build a new life.”

Nehla then met a young man and married him when she was very young. After her marriage, she returned to Shengal with her husband but then they returned to the camp.

“Women are sold in camps”

Nehla felt bad for returning to the camp. She told us how she suffered from the trauma of getting married at a young age.

“There is no gender equality in life. Young women should think of this when they make a decision about their lives. Young women should know their partners before getting married. Marrying and starting a family requires serious responsibilities. Child marriage is the reason for suicides in women. Women believe the fake love words and promises of men. Child marriage is like a game for girls and boys. But when they realize the real-life, they commit suicide. Many women are killed in the camps; women are burned, choked, subjected to violence and they go missing. Very bad things happen in the camps. Women are sold there. Women have no opportunity to work in the camps. People don’t want to live there. That’s why the rate of suicide is so high in the camps.”

She returned to Shengal

After living in the camp for a while, Nehla returned to Shengal, “Shengal is not like the camps. My life has a meaning here. I planted an olive tree here, as the tree grows, women become freer, Shengal becomes a more beautiful place. Women living here are not the women who lived in Shengal before when women had to stay in houses. They are very active now. They can defend themselves, demand their rights, and join every protest. Daesh cannot abduct the women of Shengal anymore. The women learned how to defend themselves.”